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AM/PM |
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Prof. Beef |
Dr. Meat |
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| Usually, when Dr. Meat takes
a date to AM/PM, he and his woman grab a half a dozen corndogs, and a
jumbo, sixty-four ounce Coke with two straws. But this time, The
Burger Guys made the visit with a purpose beyond just wooing the
opposite sex. This is a comprehensive burger review site. If
we have to wallow in the mud with our readers, we will. Even though
our next review may be from Wolfgang Puck's Los Angeles restaurant, Spango,
we have an obligation to service the needs of all our readers, no matter
how degrading that may be.
While I won't even buy gas at a facility that doesn't check under the hood, Meat knew exactly were to go and what to do for this review. Our cheeseburgers were found underneath the chicken sandwiches, directly in front of the beer rack. As we reached in the hot tray and pulled out our foil wrapped lunch, the counter person informed us that they were just put in and were extra fresh. The very small and thin "all-beef" patty had a smoky, almost breakfast pork sausage flavor. It was slightly better than several of the "Big 5" burgers. This Jr. High School sized burger came complete with a slice of melted American process cheese. The bun was an airy cheap imitation of a Wonder-type bun. Since this cheeseburger came naked, Meat had to walk me over to the condiment bar, and we applied our white onion pieces, catsup, mustard and relish. While I am no fan of any restaurant that makes its customers dress up it meals, at least I didn't have to spend the first ten minutes scraping off a truck load of mayo. AM/PM does not sell fries, and when asked about this omission, the informative clerk strongly stated that they don't serve that "frozen crap" and handed me a bag of Doritos. |
I know what you are thinking "why would a couple
of sophisticated experts like yourselves go to AM/PM?" For
the burger of course! We resolved to leave no bun unturned.
Sure it self serve, you have to put on your own condiments, and it is a
little on the small side, but hey it was two for $.99 cents!
The cheeseburger was a hot patty that was a frozen
jobbie complete with a slice of processed American cheese (food??), an
inexpensive Wonder like bun (now I know where all the bread companies
that used to fill the generic aisles in the eighties, go to sell their
product), and that's it.
The condiment bar was small and really limiting, but I
thought to myself how amazingly clean it was. There were no
pickles in the onions, the mustard dispenser didn't had those dried
mustard boogers on them, and the napkins were large and plenty for the
taking. Although the lack of fries at this establishment seriously
lowers the score, I don't think I would've wanted their version of a fry
anyway.
The one impressive thing about AM/PM is the soda
fountain and the prices that go along with it. In some
establishments you ask for a large and they give you a thimble of Coke
for $1.89! At AM/PM you can purchase the Exxon Valdez of Coke
(that is precisely mixed to perfection) for under a buck.
If I were stuck in traffic, and I wanted a quick
"gut-bomb" that's not slopping over with mayo-mustard-catsup,
and I wanted a big Coke I would go to AM/PM for their version of the no
frills Drive In Burger ( complete with foil wrap).
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